Sonsie Says...

Well, it’s that time again! I hope you all had a wonderful February. Valentine’s Day and all. I got a very nice Valentine from Tethys. And I tried to get him to come out and play in the land but although he is smitten, I still don’t think he trusts me! Imagine that! A mage who doesn’t trust his valentine!

Rainbow makes the news again this month by accusing Mercury of underhanded behaviour. Seems Rainbow asked Mercury to help with keep and Mercury did the whole thing alone and scarfed all the treasure. Now how did he do that????

There was a visit from a player named Marc early in the month. I heard him called by more than one player ‘a lowlife opportunist’. Never saw him above superhero, but then who knows what other characters he plays!

Laura is deeply disturbed at the lengths some people will go to keep her in the Rogues Gallery. Her bounty is so high now that she says she will have to either die or make wiz to clear it! I wonder which it will be!

Twink is a funny fellow. Told me he has holey socks and wears baggy long johns and old Wellies. A tip for you my friend! Dress for success!! You’ll never make wiz dressed the way you are! <g> Or so I’m told!

Trefle was seen in the land recently after an extended absence. When asked where she’d been hiding herself she made reference to her new boyfriend, Bill. I suppose she’s busy with the grand jury stuff bout now.

Sancorro has proven himself evil once more. Killed me, ME! As mage and he a superhero. I always wait too long to flee. Well, I’ll be watching out for him. And if you see him, kick him a few times for me! Now that I can use the LS again, I hope he trips and falls on it!

Crab has had quite a lot of bad luck this month I’ve heard. Seems the exceptionally large goblin kicked his…well, lets just say he was a novice after that fight. He dusted off his pants and was mage again in no time, only to die again to an orc!! The moral of this story is…never try to steal from a zombie when fighting an orc! A moment of silence please...

I guess my own stupidity shouldn’t be left out of this column. After my untimely death to Sancorro, I was blissfully playing my shiny new warlock one day when the skeleton1 took offence to my stealing his ring. I thought I had it covered, having 4 vials, even though I had no clue as to what they were. I drank them all at once and my stam dropped to 5, so I did a flee, resite. Guess what? The skeleton1 had attacked me in my site so I didn’t move. He killed me in one hit.

Did anyone else hear about Pepper the mage? She was fodded by an unknown wiz!! Evidently she was mouthing off rather loudly and whoever it was wasn’t taking it in the spirit in which it was being offered.
No worries though. Her last words as she lay dying were “I’ll be back.” And then she was gone. Or so I heard anyway. That’s the trouble with getting stuff second hand. You just never know what you can believe.

Rumour has it that one of the new mortals in the land, Tetsuo, is none other than an arch wiz in disguise. I was shocked to think that anyone could think an arch would stoop to such..umm…mortal levels, but who knows? I suppose stranger things have happened! Tethys said he thinks the player got his name by thinking TEThys Soon to be Upset Over being a novice. <cackle> (Tethys, darling, hardly anyone gets all the way up there without losing at least one mage they tell me! You could use the tips you picked up in Edinburgh, if you can remember them!)

And speaking of Edinburgh, what’s this Edinburgh Mafia I keep hearing about? Is the land being overrun with organised crime? It’s bad enough being disorganised! The killers will now be hit men? And how many points do I have to pay one to get rid of Sancorro??

This just in from an anonymous wiz source. It seems a certain waggish wizard has fallen head over heels in love with a certain tea sipping necromancess and they plan to be married this summer! Can it be true?? Will there be a wedding in the Abbatical church? I want to be a flower girl!

I have also heard of a recent debate in the tearoom between Crab and Rainbow and Sirkilalot as to who fancies me more. You guys will win my favour with flowers. Lots of them!! I plan to pluck the petals to scatter at the wedding! And Gromit thinks I might prefer wizzes! <g> I didn’t know he cared! <blush>

Watch out for Rossi the killer. I think he killed a player (Redeyes maybe) recently so steer well away from that, unless you want to try to take him out. I hear he is mighty and very fierce! I will probably stay in the tearoom if he is around. I fear for my life! He and Sancorro give a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘You take my breath away!”

Stop the presses!! A late breaking event that cannot go by without being noted. Tethys the mage is now Tethys the novice, and although Tetsuo WAS in the game at the time, he cannot be blamed for this. The three of us were attempting a bash and had it down to less than 20 mobiles, when Tethys decided to get the apes. I was hopelessly lost in that ape area looking for Tethys to help him when I heard the bell. He had apparently attacked them all at once! The obit read “Tethys the mage killed by the ape0 and 4 apes.” At that point I decided to avenge his death by picking off the apes responsible and I got 3 of them, one being worth 1500 points! But was struck suddenly by that odd lag that makes everything go in slow motion. So, although I had wafers I was unable to use them and the ape4 killed Sonsie the warlock. So... a moment of silence once again, ok, make it 2 moments...

Fat32 is a pest. Blowing people up with the gunpowder if it looks like he will lose the fight. He gets the weenie award for February! And with that I will end my column for this month. Remember folks! Send me your gossip and if you don’t have any, make some up! I’m looking forward to hearing from you soon!

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Page last modified: March 09, 1998